Solved.

Because I won't give up, I've got rid of the loose ends and can sleep soundly again tonight. My essay's 1/3 way there, yes, it's still not finished after all these months. There's one thing left I want, apart from a first class honours, but I know I can't have it. It's taking forever to make the peace? Zone myself out from it completely and hope that one day I'll make my peace? Sigh, what to do? Life is confusing all over again.

I want too much out of life. I expect too much out of people. I dream too far. But that's got nothing to do with what anyone thinks.